Life isn’t for the faint of heart, with its unpredictability, natural disasters, and having to allow others to have their boundaries and opinions instead of just agreeing with us all the time, but thankfully we humans have adapted and put several controls in place that greatly reduce our anxiety of the world beyond our doorstep. Seatbelts and airbags allow for safer driving, helmets keep bikers brains from bouncing too hard in an accident, water wings keep us buoyant when learning to swim, and when all else fails there’s health insurance.
Insurance is that nice comfy cushion that stands between us and the big “what if”. We all know the importance of life, car and home insurance – but some people have taken their need for insurance a step further, and that’s how we’ve wound up with strange policies such as:
1. Immaculate Conception insurance: Any Christian will confirm their faith about the miracle of Mary’s virgin birth, but most parents wouldn’t be so understanding if their daughter claimed to be carrying the Christ-child. Apparently this wasn’t an issue for Essex-based Britishinsurance.com, who insured several women in the event they immaculate conceived and found themselves in need of funds to properly raise Christ. In their defense, the firm said the women would have to prove it was Christ and the premium on the insurance was donated to charity, but that didn’t stop the outcry from the Catholic Church. Due to the uproar, the policy was withdrawn and the ladies, that paid 100 pounds annually for the insurance, will have to rely on a miracle, not health insurance, should they find themselves carrying the Chosen One.
2. Love Insurance: Breakups suck and they are even worse if it’s the breakup of a marriage. In addition to watching the person you love walk out the door, up to half of your belonging can go right along with them. Divorce is emotionally and financially devastating – but not so much financially if you know about www.wedlockdivorceinsurance.com. Here’s how it works. You pay into the policy monthly and if you get divorced, you get a payout. Here’s another idea: invest your time and money into your marriage instead and get a much bigger return on investment. Quite frankly, if I knew my partner had a price riding on our eventual breakup, I wouldn’t disappoint him.
3. Supernatural Home Insurance: Worried about alien abduction, haunted hallways and thirsty vampires? Fear no more. According to some rumors, the prestigious Lloyd’s of London actually issued policies against alien abduction, Yeti attacks, being a vampire’s lunch, and even attacks by the Loch Ness Monster (Nessie). The evidence required to claim the policy includes a third party witness, a lie detector test and recorded evidence, but just in case your daily life crosses over into supernatural territory, it’s good to know you can collect a little something for your troubles.
4. Body Part Insurance: Taking insuring ones income to the next level, countless celebrities have insured the body part(s) that made them famous. Troy Polamalu luxurious locks, Mariah Carey’s long legs and Daniel Craig’s Bond-worthy body all are all insured for millions.
5. Improbable Insurance: Making yet another entry on this list, Lloyd’s of London is happy to sell you insurance for the most improbable events. Multiple birth coverage (actually bought and claimed by a couple that had not one, but two sets of twins), and insurance against long shot contests such as Cutty Sark’s “catch the Loch Ness Monster” are just two of the far-reaching policies Lloyds offers. Don’t worry, they really do have your best interest in mind. That is why you can also buy insurance for cash to replace up to two of your employees should they win the lottery and not return to work.
6. Wedding Insurance: Some of the policies on this list are downright silly (I’m willing to change my tune if I get abducted by Nessie while running from a vampire after winning the lottery while carrying the Christ-child), but wedding insurance actually makes sense. With average Canadian wedding costs over $30,000, the slightest mishap can turn your big (read: expensive) day into a big expensive nightmare. Wedding insurance specialists WedSafe is happy to point out the many things that can go wrong – and the amount of money they have paid out in claims.
If you are shaking your head at someone that can get health insurance against their house being haunted while you struggle to find insurance because of your risky job or health condition(s), know that there are real, normal policies out there for you. No medical life insurance means you have options. These policies include simplified issue and guaranteed issue policies – two terms you need to talk to an insurance advisor about if you are having trouble obtaining insurance. At the end of the day, there is a policy out there for everyone. Sometimes you need to look a little to find it (and sometimes you need a Yeti lurking in your back yard).